the monotony of this thing called "life"
6am--Wake up
6:10--bath
6:45--breakfast
7:10--leave for school
Day in day out, that is the plan.
Sometimes I forget the point of going to my classes. I habitually come late for class, sometimes skipping even if i'm right outside the classroom, and when I do come to class I find myself drawing Jack doodles on the back of my notebook to pass time. More often than not I daydream in class; I imagine the instructor wearing something ridiculous. Sometimes I would invent scenarios in my head worthy of winning an Academy-award for Best Original Screenplay. I'd often look outside the classroom and observe the faces of the people passing by. I'd try my very best to not fall asleep during class, and when the professor finally says "okay, we will continue the discussion on Wednesday" my senses become sharper and the drowsiness I've felt like two minutes ago was gone.
6:10--bath
6:45--breakfast
7:10--leave for school
Day in day out, that is the plan.
Sometimes I forget the point of going to my classes. I habitually come late for class, sometimes skipping even if i'm right outside the classroom, and when I do come to class I find myself drawing Jack doodles on the back of my notebook to pass time. More often than not I daydream in class; I imagine the instructor wearing something ridiculous. Sometimes I would invent scenarios in my head worthy of winning an Academy-award for Best Original Screenplay. I'd often look outside the classroom and observe the faces of the people passing by. I'd try my very best to not fall asleep during class, and when the professor finally says "okay, we will continue the discussion on Wednesday" my senses become sharper and the drowsiness I've felt like two minutes ago was gone.
After class I would find myself not knowing what to do. I have several options:
[a] go to the library to sleep
[a] go to the library to sleep
[b] buy something to eat
[c] go outside to smoke
[d] go home
[e] go to tambayan
[f] ride the jeep so you can make the choice later.
Normally, I take [f] the jeep where I [a] sleep for a few minutes and then I would go down near some food stall so I can [b] buy something to eat and afterwards i'd [c] smoke and then i'd [e] go to the tambayan. And much much later I'd [d] go home.
That's basically what goes on every day.
I barely study anymore. I just don't see the point anymore.
I am no longer remotely interested in anything I used to appreciate so much.
I am essentially just a ghost of my former self; an empty shell who retained my former self's appearance.
Am I angry? Am I depressed?
No. I think I'm not.
I'm simply empty.
